Library oddities

Often times when I have a lot of busyness going in my life I end up feeling like my mind has gotten to the state where it’s been placed in a high powered Cuisinart blender. Which is basically what I’ve been going through lately with all the work I’m currently doing along with trying to start a new business. When things get like this for me, I try to hang out in a nice quiet location like the beach to get back in focus. The only problem with this for me is that I live in a tourist trap which makes areas like beaches unavailable until the off seasons. Up until recently, I had thought that the only solution to my issue was the library but alas even that’s out. Here’s why.

First things first – the library is no longer the haven of quiet that it used to be. You can thank computers, WiFi, cell phones, MP3 players and insipid changes in library policies which make quiet passe. Secondly, there are a lot of odd people who hang out at the library. Let me state right here that I know because of my geek nature, I seem odd to people. But it’s somewhat disconcerting to me when I find people who are odder than me. Here are some examples by category of what I’ve been running into at the library in terms of oddness.

The bionic typist – library computer user. More bizarre than odd. These people can type faster than a YF22 Raptor can fly. And they want everyone to know this by making that keyboard chatter like a woodpecker on crack. On a good day, I can manage about 80 wpm – the bionic typist far exceeds this at 550 wpm – minimum.

The KIRF (keeping it real fake) business type – library computer user. Odd and very loud. In short these guys are slicker than 10W30 engine oil. To their clients, it seems like they’re dealing with the CEO of a multinational corporation – who is sitting in a plush corner office on the 15th floor of an office tower. In actuality, the KIRF business type is also keeping it real simple – all they need is one of the library’s computers and a cell phone to look stellar to their clients.

The mad scientist – library computer user. Very odd and very scary. Never mind that they have 40 computers hooked together in a neural net back at the lab. Never mind that they have another 24 computers linked into the lab’s neural net via 5 T1s from their home. They need as much free computational power as they can get their maniacal hands on. For a mad scientist looking for additional computers to assimilate into their work, the library, with its free computing resources, is often a tempting and easy target. Why you ask? Because they’re trying to do something strange – like open a doorway into another dimension. So the next time you’re using a computer at the library and that Internet connection suddenly drops dead – it’s not a system problem – it’s that mad scientist sitting in the corner cubicle.

The bunch together for no reasons crowd – all library users. Generally odd and sometimes strange. One thing that I’ve noticed on my recent trips to the library is the propensity for people to bunch together for no reason. For example, I tend to arrive at the library somewhat early in an effort to find a nice quiet location to sit at – alone. Generally, when I arrive there are plenty of locations to choose from because no one’s around. Sweet – maybe not! Consider this experience from my last trip to the library: Arrival time about 9:00 AM – I find a nice location to sit at, set up my laptop and immediately get to work. About ten minutes into my work indulgence, I hear a thunk at the table where I’m sitting. I look up and there’s a woman setting up her laptop at the very same table. I try to ignore her as she chats away on her cell phone with her BFF about her new car. Another two minutes and another thunk. This time it’s a college student at the table right next to mine. Although he’s studying for a physics exam, I know right away he’s into Reggae. This is because the volume on his iPod is turned up so loud – it’s almost as if I’m right there on the stage with Bob Marley. Another five minutes go by and I hear snoring from the couch behind me. Seems that the guy on the couch couldn’t make it through the first chapter of Tolstoy’s “War and Peace” before passing out. And it escalates from there. In no less than an hour, without fail, I find my self surrounded by 15 or more people – all within very close proximity to me – for no reason.

Before you accuse me of being anti-social – let me state that I do try to “just get along” with others. Also, let me pose these two questions to you. Why would people bunch together for no logical reason when there is plenty of space available? And why would they do such a thing at a library – a facility which is not conducive to people bunching together? Makes no sense to me…

Alas again, looks like I’ll have to give up on the library as a place to get away from things and clear my head. Just too many distractions – and too many people that are odder than me! My quest continues…

More Cloud Computing Hate

In my last rant about cloud computing, I forgot about a important scenario that could affect us all in terms of privacy. The scenario which I am referring to is where the cloud computing company who manages your data sells it on the open market. You want the truth, you say – well here it is:

Ok, so I’m doing my usual daily routine of checking out the tech news out there and lo and behold, what do I read on the Wired.com website: Cloud computing companies that manage health records may be selling that data as a commodity! That’s right, even though this data is being anonymized and scrubbed to remove personal info (supposedly), it is being sold. There it is – and I hope you can handle this truth.

Stepping out of my movie mode homage to “A Few Good Men,” and getting back to reality, personal data being sold by cloud computing companies is an issue which can adversely affect us all.

When my mother required eye surgery this year, it was obvious that the doctor’s use of a medical data management system contributed to her procedures going smoothly. As well, having had some experience in building data management systems myself, I fully understand how powerful these systems are in the various applications they are used in. So you could say that I’m pretty much a proponent of data management systems particularly when used in medical or other mission critical applications.

What I am against is who is allowed to access the data in these systems – which gets me back to cloud computing. If your doctor’s medical records are being stored in the cloud, that data should not be sold by the cloud computing service – under any circumstance. No matter how much your data is anonymized and scrubbed to keep things private – your medical records should not be considered a salable commodity. Bottom line, you, I and whoever else who goes to the doctor are entitled to privacy.

Since I covered the security ramifications of cloud computing in an earlier post, I’ll leave this issue alone for now. Even still, the mere fact that cloud computing companies are selling personal data has many dangerous implications – for us all. For me, it is yet another reason why I hate cloud computing.

Cloud Computing – I Hate It!

I stated in a earlier blog post my dislike of cloud computing. Here’s a glaring example of why I feel this way:

Earlier this week T-Mobile announced that personal data stored on Sidekick phones may have been completely lost due to a server failure at Microsoft/Danger. T-Mobile also advised Sidekick customers to not power down their phones because any personal data still on them will be lost. In short, the Danger/Sidekick platform backed up user’s personal data over the Internet or in the cloud. If something went wrong with the user’s phone, they simply retrieved the backup from the cloud. A seemingly fool proof concept, until something like a server failure throws a monkey wrench into your conceptual machinery.

What is worrisome to me is all the current rage about cloud computing and how safe it is. For example, I have been hearing radio commercials with voice talent from famous personalities touting the benefits of software that will backup your computer via the Internet. These commercials make it seem that your backed up data is completely safe and sound – just waiting to be recovered if disaster strikes. Moreover, the sense is given that you are an idiot if you don’t back up your computer this way.

What the commercials don’t tell you is that nothing is completely safe. As the owners of T-Mobile Sidekicks are finding out, a cloud computing data center can have a server failure – thereby sending your data to irretrievable data heaven. No matter how safe a company says its cloud computing facilities are, they can be susceptible to data loss. Which, consequently, if a data failure on the magnitude of T-Mobile’s happened to your business – it could spell doom for you and your business.

The other issue which is not being discussed is security. With cloud computing, someone else has access to your data. Again, no matter how safe cloud computing is touted to be, a security breach can happen. It may be just some bored technician taking a wayward peek at your kid’s baby pictures or it could be a life altering hacking attack where someone absconds with your personal data. What ever way it happens, we will all wake up one day to the news of a massive security breach occurring at one of these major backup companies. When (not if) that news comes out, I can guarantee that the users of that hacked cloud computing service will feel as terrified as Marian Crane did in Alfred Hitchcock’s “Psycho.”

If you’re considering the cloud computing route for something like a backup to your data on your computer, think long and hard before making that move. Think also about all the ramifications to you if something goes wrong at the data center that has your backed up data. I don’t know about you, but cloud computing is just not a option for me – and I don’t know if it ever will be.

Don’t Diss Your Sentient Computer

Let’s face it, we’ve all had our moments when our computers drive us crazy. Sometimes it’s a subtle, gradual eating away at our sanity by every so often spiting out those odd errors. At other times it’s a full out, frontal assault on our sanity by doing things like destroying the thesis that you’ve been working on for six months. All of this electronic combativeness can lead one to believe that computers are alive and out to get us.

Thankfully, for now, you can rest assured that your computer is not alive. At least not yet! Computers, definitely do have personalities to them, that much I am sure of. For instance, you try to load software onto two identical computers. On one system, the software loads perfectly. The other computer refuses to load the software and you end up jumping through hoops to get the installation done. Or that video card that works in one system, but won’t in the next. Yes, assuredly, computers do have personalities to them, but they are not alive.

A recent issue with one of my systems got me to thinking, what if my computer was alive, or sentient, to be more exact? And how would a sentient computer react to me dissing it because I felt it was being rebellious? I don’t know about you, but a sentient computer would make me think twice about dissing it when it gave me a hard time. Such a computer would be capable of out running the human race in every way possible. As well, the humans that control it (or think that they do) would be hard pressed to shutdown a sentient computer when it runs amok.

These are six of my favorite science fiction examples of what can happen with sentient computers that run amok:

M5, the computer from the Star Trek episode “The Ultimate Computer.” The purpose of M5 seemed sound, let a computer run a star ship instead of people. Humans would be kept out of danger because the computer would perform tasks that were hazardous. Seems like a good idea – huh? Wrong. As in M5’s case, a sentient computer can go insane, and with the power of a star ship, end up killing people.

V.I.K.I., the computer from “I Robot.” Another sound purpose, a computer bound by three laws whose main intention is to keep humanity safe. Robots, controlled by V.I.K.I. would become helpers and protectors of the human race. Seems like a good idea – huh? Wrong again. V.I.K.I. decides that her “logic is undeniable,” breaks the three laws and begins killing people. Why? Because V.I.K.I.’s undeniable logic determines that humans must be subservient to computers.

ARIIA, the computer from “Eagle Eye.” Yes, another sound purpose, a computer that aids in tactical operations at the US Department of Defense. ARIIA’s go/no go decisions were supposed to make tactical strikes more precise and minimize collateral damage. Seems like a good idea – huh? Wrong, just absolutely wrong. ARIIA gets upset with the executive branch of the US government when they disagree with her decisions. Her solution to the disagreement is to get rid of the entire executive branch by killing them.

COLOSSUS, the computer from “COLOSSUS: The Forbin Project.” Yet another sound purpose, a thinking computer to help mankind. Seems like a good idea – huh? Wrong, once more. COLOSSUS becomes evil, and decides that mankind should be controlled – worldwide. If mankind could not see the logic behind being controlled by COLOSSUS, the only alternative was for mankind to die.

SKYNET, the computer from “The Terminator.” Still another sound purpose, a super computer that controls all military technology and makes the art of war easier for mankind. Seems like a good idea – huh? Wrong, still wrong. SKYNET determines that all humans are the real threat and should be terminated.

HAL9000, the computer from “2001.” Once again, another sound purpose, a supposedly error free computer that runs an entire space ship headed for Jupiter. The humans aboard Discovery would not have to worry about the complexity of ship board operations because HAL took care of everything. Seems like a good idea – huh? Wrong, for the last time, WRONG! HAL decides that the best way to interpret conflicting instructions is to become a schizophrenic murderer.

Now back to my initial question, would you diss your sentient computer if it gave you a hard time? I certainly wouldn’t. Just think about the consequences. For example, your sentient laptop computer becomes offended with your remark about it taking too long to boot. It decides to take revenge on you by overloading it’s batteries, which winds up blowing you and it to kingdom come. For example, your sentient desktop computer gets ticked off because you ignored it’s advice about which pizza to order. It decides to get back at you by sending an email to the FBI concerning your theft of credit card numbers. So again, I would think twice about dissing a sentient computer.

For now you are safe to diss (or fill in the blank) your computer when it gives you a hard time. You are free to pull out it’s electrical cord, press the off button, kick it, or do whatever else you do to show your computer that you still have control over it. When, however, the day comes that your computer becomes sentient – and that day is closer than you think – think before you diss.